The first annual FMK karate school fund raiser was a success!

The first annual FMK Karate School fund raiser was a success!
The Chinese auction was definitely a big hit.
There was quite a turnout and we made quite a bit for the dojo!
Thanks to all who came out! :)

Non-leathal ray guns..

Non-lethal ray guns.

Apparently the U.S. military has developed a ray that makes the person feel as if they are on fire.
(I'm having a flashback to Talladega Nights...."You're not on fire Ricky bobby!")

Idiocracy.

Idiocracy. If you have an IQ above 100 and are wrestling with the thought of having kids,
see this movie. By the way thats the future president of the us driving the trike. Here's the trailer.


I actually have received some comments on my blog, at least somebody is reading this...

Masaaki Hatsumi

Masaaki Hatsumi is one of the highest ranking Bujinkan masters in Japan.
(Or is noted via the internet.)
Budo of Bujinkan is entirely in japanese and if you dont speak it is is still facinating to watch.
Have a great Friday!

this should cheer you up...

Watch this. You will laugh.

You the man george!

For 85 hours straight last week,
George Hood rode on a stationary bike.
He denied himself sleep. He hallucinated.
He moved 1,082 miles, purely in theory.
But when he stopped pedaling, his long
trip going nowhere in fact landed him
in two places: on a soon-to-appear page
in the Guinness World Records book,
and on a gurney bound for an Illinois hospital.
You the man George! Seriously!

Wow, I lead an incredibly boring life in comparison to this guy!

Thanks Dr. King

Thanks Dr. King.

thanks for writing on my car...

Someone was nice enough to write profane words across the side of my car IN PERMANENT MARKER on Friday night. It's good to know there still incredibly spineless subhuman degenerates who can't say things to peoples faces and have to write them on the side of cars. Thanks for attributing to the surplus population.

I actually do listen when people talk to me. Ahhhhh....
I feel better now. Actually I really don't care who did it. Thanks for giving me extra work to do.
To all of the kind people in the world, thank you for making my world a better place. I'm just mad that someone would do something like this to me.

I guess I'm too white and nerdy...

CHILI CONTEST

This was sent to me by Dave and Judy Newmark. I haven't laughed so hard in a while. God you guys made my week! I had to post this.

Note: This joke may be mildly offensive and basically is total (toylet) toilet humor....

If you can read this whole story without laughing,well then there's no hope for you.

>> This is an actual account as relayed paramedics at a chili cook-off in Texas.
Note: Please take time to read this slowly. If you pay attention to the first two judges, the reaction of the thirdjudge is even better.
Judge #3 was an inexperienced chili taster named Frank, who was visiting from Springfield, IL.

Frank: "Recently, I was honored to be selected as a judge at a chili cook-off. The original person called in sick atthe last moment and I happened to be standing there at the judge's table, asking for directions to the Coors Light truck, when the call
came in. I was assured by the other two judges (native Texans) that the
chili wouldn't be all that spicy; and, besides, they told me I could have free beer during the tasting, so I accepted and became Judge 3."

Here are the scorecard notes from the event:

>> CHILI # 1 - MIKE'S MANIAC MONSTER CHILI

>> Judge # 1 -- A little too heavy on the tomato.Amusing kick.

>> Judge # 2 -- Nice, smooth tomato flavor. Very mild.

>> Judge # 3 (Frank) -- Holy crap, what the hell is this stuff? You could remove dried paint from your driveway. Took me two beers to put the flames out. I hope that's the worst one. These Texans are crazy.
>>
>> CHILI # 2 - AUSTIN'S AFTERBURNER CHILI
>>
>> Judge # 1 -- Smoky, with a hint of pork. Slight jalapeno tang.

>> Judge # 2 -- Exciting BBQ flavor, needs more peppers to be taken seriously.
>>
>> Judge # 3 -- Keep this out of the reach of children. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to taste besides pain. I had to wave off two people who wanted to give me the Heimlich maneuver. They had to rush in more beer when they saw the look on my face.
>>
>> CHILI # 3 - FRED'S FAMOUS BURN DOWN THE BARN CHILI
>>
>> Judge # 1 -- Excellent firehouse chili. Great kick.
>>
>> Judge # 2 -- A bit salty, good use of peppers.
>>
>> Judge # 3 -- Call the EPA. I've located a uranium spill. My nose feels like I have been snorting Drano.
>>Everyone knows the routine by now. Get me more beer before I ignite. Barmaid pounded me on the back, now my backbone is in the front part of my chest. I'm getting shit-faced from all of the beer.
>>
>> CHILI # 4 - BUBBA'S BLACK MAGIC
>>
>> Judge # 1 -- Black bean chili with almost no spice. Disappointing.
>>
>> Judge # 2 -- Hint of lime in the black beans.
>>Good side dish for fish or other mild foods, not much of a chili.
>>
>> Judge # 3 -- I felt something scraping across my tongue, but was unable to taste it. Is it possible to burn out taste buds? Sally, the beer maid, was standing behind me with fresh refills.This 300 lb. woman is starting to look HOT ... just like this nuclear waste I'm eating! Is chili an aphrodisiac?
>>
>> CHILI # 5 - LISA'S LEGAL LIP REMOVER

>> Judge # 1 -- Meaty, strong chili. Cayenne peppers freshly ground, adding considerable kick. Very impressive.
>>
>> Judge # 2 -- Chili using shredded beef, could
>>use more tomato. Must admit the cayenne peppers make a strong statement.
>>
>> Judge # 3 -- My ears are ringing, sweat ispouring off my forehead and I can no longer focus my eyes. I farted, andfour people behind me needed paramedics. The contestant seemed offendedwhen I told her that her chili had given me brain damage. Sally saved mytongue from bleeding by pouring beer directly on it from the pitcher. Iwonder if I'm burning my lips off. It really ticks me off that the otherjudges asked me to stop screaming. Screw them.

>> CHILI # 6 - VERA'S VERY VEGETARIAN VARIETY
>>
>> Judge # 1 -- Thin yet bold vegetarian variety chili. Good balance of spices and peppers.
>>
>> Judge # 2 -- The best yet. Aggressive use of peppers, onions, garlic. Superb.
>>
>> Judge # 3 -- My intestines are now a straight pipe filled with gaseous, sulfuric flames. I crapped on myself when I
farted, and I'm worried it will eat through the chair. No one seems inclined to stand behind me except that Sally. Can't feel my lips anymore. I need to wipe my butt with a snow cone.
>>
>> CHILI # 7 - SUSAN'S SCREAMING SENSATION CHILI
>>
>> Judge # 1 -- A mediocre chili with too much reliance on canned peppers.
>>
>> Judge # 2 -- Ho hum, tastes as if the chef literally threw in a can of chili peppers at the last moment. **I
should take note that I am worried about Judge # 3. He appears to be a bit of distress as he is cursing uncontrollably.
>>
>> Judge # 3 -- You could put a grenade in my mouth, pull the pin, and I wouldn't feel a thing. I've lost sight
in one eye, and the world sounds like it is made of rushing water. My shirt is covered with chili, which slid unnoticed out of my mouth. My pants are full of lava to match my shirt. At least during the autopsy, they'll know what killed me. I've decided to stop breathing it's too painful. Screw it;I'm not getting any oxygen anyway. If I need air, I'll just suck it
in through the 4-inch hole in my stomach.
>>
>> CHILI # 8 - BIG TOM'S TOENAIL CURLING CHILI
>>
>> Judge # 1 -- The perfect ending, this is a nice blend chili. Not too bold but spicy enough to declare its existence.
>>
>> Judge # 2 -- This final entry is a good, balanced chili. Neither mild nor hot. Sorry to see that most of it was lost when Judge #3 farted, passed out, fell over and pulled the chili pot down on top of himself. Not sure if he's going to make it. Poor feller, wonder how he'd have reacted to really hot chili?

>> Judge # 3 - No Report.

Thanks again guys.

Print this out and put it on your wall.

Print this out and put it on your wall. Just in case there are snakes on your next flight.....
Click the image for a closer view.

Altered States

Altered states. I just bought this film on dvd. Basically one lesson can be learned from this film.
LSD will turn you into a raving C.H.U.D. ugly Neanderthal that eats live goats.It should be shown to high school teenagers on why hallucinogenic drugs can totally mess you up or mutate you into a giant hemorrhoid.
The visual imagery reminds me of 2001 a space odyssey with a little clockwork orange. Very, very weird but extremely entertaining. My advice Don't watch this in an altered state, (aside from a few stiff drinks) it could melt your brain .
I still loved the film anyway. Can't you tell? Here's the trailer.
Jen Hughes had this to say about the film. "A classic Jake movie with acid trips, goat and lizard murders, visions of hell and a several goats with multiple eyes. It proves a man must first regress into a pre-human state in order to realize he loves his wife."
Also rented Snakes on a plane. Samuel L. Jackson shouts and swears a lot , snakes bite people in their privates and Uh, yeah...I have to watch it again. I'm speechless.
Enjoy the weekend!

Goodbye Lilly..

Scream Queen and Actress Yvonne De Carlo passed away, she was best known for her role as Lilly Munster.

HOT FUZZ!

The Guys who made Sean of the Dead have a new film coming out called "Hot Fuzz".
Looks pretty funny. Check out the trailer.

Nill illigitimi carborundum

Survived the first week of the new year. Hopefully I won't jinx myself.
Not much planned for the weekend.


Nill illigitimi carborundum - Do not let the bastards get you down.

Here are two of the best episodes of Mythbusters you've never seen.

I'm a huge fan of Mythbusters even though I don't have cable.
Here are two of the best episodes of Mythbusters you've never seen.
Probably because they deal with well....

Flatulence.

Enjoy!

Big congratulations to Peter and Erin!

Big congratulations to Peter and Erin who were married this past weekend! I really wish I could have been there, it looked like a ton of fun! We wish you a very healthy and happy life together!

New Star Wars trailer

Here it is the rumors are true.
New star wars trailer. The story that couldn't be told till now....